A study published in the Journal of Neuroscience to the brains of 40 “socially rejected” volunteers, people who’d gotten dumped in the last six months. They were asked to bring two photos to the brain-imaging lab: one of an ex, another of a friend.
The participants looked at these photos while a temperature-controlled device applied pressure to their arms. While their brains were being scanned, the participants were asked to rate the amount of pain they felt.
Researchers found that the parts of the brain that light up when a person is in physical pain are similar to the parts of the brain that feel emotional pain. Put simply, heartbreak hurts.
So researchers put a twist on the experiment, offering half of heartbroken souls a nasal spray that they told the participants was a “powerful analgesic effective in reducing emotional pain.” The other half were told the truth.
That white lie might have seemed like magical thinking, but it worked: Not only did the “magical spray” participants feel less physical and emotional pain, the neural activity in areas linked to controlling emotion spiked, with areas connected to feeling rejected simmered down.
The power of expectations in shaping your future, no matter how difficult it is, can be powerful for helping to deal with a breakup, more so when it’s bad.
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